Thoughts

Why do Parents Hit/Slap Kids?

During some evenings, I go walking around my area. Within the last one month, I noticed two cases where a small kid (less than 3 years) was slapped hard by a parent on the cheeks. In both cases, it was the mother.

In one case, the child came out of the gate when the mother was outside. So the mother shouted and slapped on the kid’s cheek with full force. The intensity of the hit stunned me. The helpless kid cried and went back inside. In another case, the kid was asking something to the mother and the mother slapped telling the kid not to disturb without a proper reason.

Both these incidents happened on the road, not even inside their houses. In both cases, I feel the reason to hit the child was trivial. Based on the tone used by the mothers, I could guess they were in a bad mood or facing some other problem, and were ‘taking it out’ on the kid.

I wonder how society has allowed such incidents to happen, that too in public? Does the parent have the right to do anything in the name of disciplining?

I wonder if there are any laws preventing parents from doing such things. Even if there are, enforcement will be a challenge. I heard that in countries like US and in Europe, society members will complain against parents if they know of such incidents, and punishments are stern – kids could even be taken away from parents.

In India, we may hesitate to implement such strict laws, but needn’t we at least discourage such things? With the rise of nuclear families, even familial monitoring by elders is not there in many cases.

I wish, at least in these two cases, the mothers are thrown into old-age homes that are cramped and poorly maintained, when they are old. That might teach them a lesson or two about KARMA.

Destination Infinity

12 Comments

  • SG

    I do not approve of any child being hit by their parents. Having said that, I want to ask you how do you know it was no fault of the kid. You were walking in the street and you saw a mother hit a child. That is all. You do not know the real background. The mother may have told the kid to stay inside the home while she is doing something outside their home. In this example, the kid disobeyed the mother. Still, I do not approve of any child being hit by their parents.

    • Rajesh K

      Nudging moderately to discipline the kid is different from hitting hard to vent out one’s frustration, not necessarily related to the kid. A neutral observer can tell that.

      Destination Infinity

  • Locomente

    Most of parents who are packed to the oldage homes would have treated their children badly… I guess… I also think the same… what makes the parents hit their children?

    • Rajesh K

      Either they would have treated their children badly or they would have set a wrong example by treating their parents badly, is what I think.

      Destination Infinity

    • Rajesh K

      I feel, hitting kids to discipline them is a non-solution that adds only to the problem and not the solution. The kids are bound to act good in front of their parents and behave extreme outside. I am sure no one wants that.

      Destination Infinity

  • Jeevan

    I think parents who are intended to be strict; to bring discipline in kids, only tries to enforce punishment… This isn’t a right way to bring up a child; first parents need to perceive the difference between the both. The children who are treat with love and affection shares the same with others. But pampering is wrong.

    • Rajesh K

      As I look at it, these two incidents were not about disciplining at all. They were more like a vent to the parent’s sadistic attitude.

      Destination Infinity

  • Nandhini Chandrasekaran

    This is so common in India. In other countries, not only the society members, the kids themselves can complain about their parents to police.

    This is a little complicated. I feel, sometimes when children can’t be corrected in other ways, a light beating isn’t wrong though a tight slap is sad. In places like US, kids will be locked in a room calling it ‘time out’ to teach them a lesson. For the mental trauma it creates in them, a light beat on the back is far better.

    • Rajesh K

      Yes. All I am saying is, there is a difference between beating lightly to correct the kid and beating hard to take out your tension. It was clearly the latter in both cases and that’s what I am against.

      Destination Infinity

  • Avada Kedavra

    I agree with this post. I can never understand why a parent would slap their kid. Recently I saw one woman threatening her kid that she will lock the door and the kid would have to stay outside. I felt so bad for the kid. Instead of such threats, she could have politely asked the kid to come inside. I have resolved to never hit or even shout at my kid ever. Let’s see how it goes.

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